Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Counting The Real Cost
"Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Will he not first sit down and estimate the cost to see if he has enough money to complete it? For if he lays the foundation and is not able to finish it, everyone who sees it will ridicule him, saying, 'This fellow began to build and was not able to finish." Luke 14:28-30
OK, so I'm a little slow. Maybe even, more than a little. Allie, you can stop agreeing with me now.
Forever, it seems, I have understood this passage of scripture. I understand that it relates to being a disciple of Christ and following Him, no matter what it costs you. I "get" that. Really I do! But I hadn't seen how it relates to our adoption and I hadn't seen the battle that has been going on around me, until now.
Lately, I have allowed my enemy to use this scripture against me in regards to our adoption. I have allowed him to blind me to the spiritual truth of what Christ was saying in this parable and focused only on taking the verse literally. I have been, pitifully, thinking of it in terms of our adoption finances. I've been dwelling on how high the financial costs are. And even worrying about how we may be viewed as not having counted those costs.
This morning during my quiet time, I FINALLY realized that I was under attack from my enemy and that I was letting him win.
Every time I have watched the cost of adoption increase, I have heard my enemy repeat this verse. Every time we have had a financial need come up and had to take a large amount of money out of our savings account I have heard this verse. Every time we have made poor financial decisions (yes we're human and we sometimes do that) I have allowed my enemy to throw this verse in my face. Every time I have watched stocks fall or our economy decline, I have let my enemy use this verse as a weapon against me.
Praise God, my eyes are finally open to the fact that the REAL cost of following God's plan for our families adoption has very little to do with money! The REAL costs that are worth considering are far different and I have counted them! I totally understand that the REAL adoption costs are far greater than any monetary amount and I am so willing to pay them.
Now that I 'get" it, here's what's killing me. I HAVE counted the REAL cost of adoption all along! I have counted the cost of being a stay at home mom for infinity, of not having time to myself for years, of going back into the world of Barney, pull ups and "mine!", of being asked insensitive questions about my family while waiting in line at the grocery store, of explaining racism to a toddler and of overcoming physical challenges. I have counted these costs and I am willing to pay them. And with God's grace and strength, I will be able to pay them!!!
So why am I allowing myself to be beaten up by my enemy over the financial cost? Because sometimes, I'm a little slow!
Yes, the financial aspect of adoption is huge but it is nothing to God who owns "the cattle on a thousand hills"Ps . 50:10 Perhaps I need to remind my enemy of that. While I'm at it, maybe I need to remind him that "He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion." Phil 1:6 And when I feel our finances are a weakness, I probably need to remind him that God's "power is made perfect in weakness." 2 Cor. 12:9
The REAL costs of adoption are so worth it! They are nothing compared to the blessings that will come with them!
I really "get" that now!!! I warned you...sometimes I'm a little slow!!!